The School Bells, They Are A'Ringin'!

It's Back-To-School Time!

I hope the kids had a good summer: lazy, fun, friend-filled, full of new experiences and lots of swimming, with a little bit of fighting, whining, and grumping thrown in for good measure.

We had a fractured foot, scrapes and bruises from bike accidents and a fall in a pond, lots of time-outs, a bump on the head thanks to a mean ol' diving board, and we endured the deaths of two hermit crabs, a frog, and too many lightning bugs, ladybugs, and crickets to count.

We visited Hersheypark, Knoebel's Grove, the Quittie Park, Bullfrog Valley Park, the Philly Zoo, The Outer Banks, The Lego Store in King of Prussia, Lititz and the Sturgis and Wilbur factories, Lake Tobias Wildlife Preserve, multiple movie theaters, and more.

There was a lot on my To-Do List that didn't get done, but there's always next summer.

So we did our school shopping, loaded the backpacks, packed lunches, laid out the first-day-outfits, and started early bedtimes a week before school began.

This morning went smoothly, though Ben cried a little bit shortly before picture time. He's my homebody. He'd always rather stay home than venture out just about anywhere, and he cried every day before school for a few weeks in September last year. But he made it on the bus without running back to me, and after school he told me it was a great day. Maddie loves her teacher too and said the school day didn't feel like six hours!

And me?

Well, Jack is still at home with me, so I'm not all alone. But today I went to the gym for the first time since June, mowed the lawn, went to Walmart, and cleaned a little and facebooked a little, and played Legos a little...all with just Jack. Aaaah. Blessed peace and quiet. I've made it through another summer with my sanity intact, and in two weeks when Jack returns to preschool, I will have four afternoons per week all to my lonesome little self!

That adds up to ten blissful hours per week of Beth time.

And I'm not going to feel guilty about it. This is the time I dreamed about while my nipples were bleeding from ten 45 minute breastfeeding sessions per day; while I cleaned up vomit and diarrhea; while I took care of a child, toddler and baby for three days alone when I had flu and strep throat; while pushing that swing, or playing Uno, or cleaning up Moon Sand for the thousandth time; while waking up every half hour all night long to reinsert the pacifier into the baby's mouth; while changing poopy diapers where more poop was on the outside of the diaper than on the inside; while sitting in doctor's offices for an hour and a half with three children climbing the walls trying to keep my temper and a smile on my face; while walking all night with a baby who cried the minute I sat or leaned or stopped walking.

In the working world, employees get paid, or get "Job Well Done!" emails from bosses, or earn raises or commissions or bonuses. They have vacation days to look forward to... heck, they have weekends to look forward to! Employees get lunch hours and coffee breaks and meetings attended by well-behaved co-workers.

Many husbands would say that the stay-at-home mother is on permanent vacation. Ahem.

But I say School is my payday, bonus, and coffee break, vacation days, and weekends all saved up from 9 years of loyal and unswerving service to the company, doled out in 10 hour increments each week.

May I Take Your Order?

Ask a kid what he wants to be when he grows up and he will not usually answer "accountant", "secretary", "factory worker", "salesman", or "market manager" (sorry Dave).

Kids want to be something fun: Garbage Truck driver! Baseball player! Pool Cleaner! Veterinarian! Dairy Queen Counter Girl!

When does reality hit for most kids? When do their vocational choices reflect an understanding of skill level (or lack thereof), financial backing, need for higher education, and eventual job pay and its relationship to whether they will be able to afford everything their grown-up heart desires?

I always wanted to be a teacher. In middle school, I was briefly interested in pursuing a career as a hairstylist because I loved playing with my friends' hair, but I was lured back to teaching eventually. However, I don't think I was representative of my peers.

Today in the car, the kids were discussing Who I Want to Be When I Grow Up.
Maddie: artist or fashion designer
Ben: Head of the SWAT team or Guns 'n Roses band member
Jack: firefighter, policeman, or ambulance driver.

I wish I could jump in Marty McFly's DeLorean and travel to the future and see where they end up! Maybe I'll be dressed in the Latest Maddie Wolfe design, watching my Ben sing Welcome to the Jungle to a crowd of thousands, while Jack keeps the stadium safe and secure.

Or maybe I'll have a doctor, salesman, and biology teacher visiting me for Christmas. As long as they're happy in what they do, I'm sure I'll be proud.

I Swear!

My Ben tends to get obsessed with things.

His first obsession (and his first two syllable word) was vacuum (cleaners). Next was tools, lawn mowers (at age two, he could tell you who-owned-what-lawn mower...Uncle Ed?- Cub Cadet! etc.), Thomas trains, then Star Wars, money, presidents, Pokemon, Legos and most recently Guitar Hero.

Unfortunately his new obsession is swearing.

Now, let me say, he does not use swear words (though he will spell them quietly to me when explaining a new one he heard.) But he knows any song or movie that has a swear word in it, and as the responsible big brother will set restrictions for Jack. "Sorry Jack. You can't watch this movie, it has a swear word in it." For some reason, Jack does not appreciate this brotherly service.

He recently asked me how many swear words there are (sadly, too many to count), how old he has to be to be able to use one (39), and if it's okay to say "D-a-m!" and then explain that you meant the house the beaver lives in (no, it's not okay). This week he confided in me that he didn't think "h-o-l-y s-h-e-d" really is a swear word, and he's always hearing swear words where there aren't any, as his Curse Word Radar is turned on too high and sensitive.

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I'm hoping his next obsession is more along the lines of reading, housecleaning, or good manners, but h-e-double-hockey-sticks, if this one's not over soon, I may inadvertently teach him a few new words.

"Beaver House! This ice cream is cold!"

Milestones for Mama's Sanity

The other day, I realized that we have hit another milestone: Jack can now turn on the shower, suds up, rinse off, turn off, and dry off without any help from me. That's three kids down...zero to go.

I remember when bathtime was a major chore. Getting the 4 year old showered while the baby cried and the three year old ran around naked, then getting the 3 year old showered while the 4 year old played with the baby, then bathing the baby while the 3 and 4 year olds fought or cried or asked for snacks or dumped the shampoo on the bathroom rug.

Now I can shout, "Did you use shampoo?" in the vicinity of the bathroom and my job is done.

Here are some other Milestones for Mama's Sanity we have reached:
1. Everyone can buckle his or her own car seat.
2. No more diapers.
3. No need to cut hot dogs into twenty thousand pieces.
4. Children can choose clothes and dress themselves (though I cringe at some of the combinations they come up with).
5. Everyone can swim.
6. They tell me what hurts.
7. No need to use the mega-carts at the grocery store so I can shackle buckle all three of them down for the entire grocery shopping experience.
8. Am able to sit and chat with other adults at social events instead of following a toddler around all afternoon.

I have often been warned by grandma-like women in Walmart or Giant or wherever else I've left in near-tears after a particularly trying public display, to "enjoy them! Someday they'll be grown ..." And it's true. My oldest does not fit comfortably in my lap anymore, reads her own book at bedtime, and no longer believes that my kiss makes the boo-boo better (though she'll still accept the kiss, so that's something).

But I still savor elimination of behaviors/chores that made me pull out my hair in frustration, disgust, or boredom. I just can't believe that someday I'll say, "Oh how I wish I could wipe a poopy hiney again..."

Beach Bums

We are home from a gorgeous seven days in the Outer Banks of North Carolina. Dave's entire family shares a house (thanks to his very gracious and generous parents) and we have a ball.


We used to go to Cape May, NJ, which had a lot more activity (more shopping, restaurants, house tours, nearby boardwalks, arcades, a zoo, etc.) and I do miss the fun and personality of Cape May. In the Outer Banks, we are just Beach Bums!

We celebrated two birthdays at the beach, Ben, shown above, who always has a donut cake and turned eight this year, and Tyler, my nephew, who turned 13! Below is the Birthday Boy enjoying his new iPod and ignoring the raucous sound of the waves.

We LOVE LOVE LOVE to play in the sand! This year we dug holes and jumped into them...

picked up our fallen heads...

built multiple sandcastles everyday...

and found shells galore and even a sand dollar!

Everyone loves to jump the waves and boogie board, but Maddie loves it most of all. She is the ultimate Beach Bum and could spend the entire day on the beach and it still wouldn't be enough!

The less active among us (hand to mouth-coughing noise..."me!"), enjoyed relaxing on the beach, reading book after book, with a Mike's Hard Lemonade in hand, snoozed poolside, played ladderball and Bocce, and ate way more than usual (what's vacation without gummi worms, grilled seafood, goldfish crackers, and pistachios, I ask you?)

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Ben cried the night before we left. "I don't want to go home! Let's just stay here forever!"

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But of course we couldn't. So we are home and back to healthy meals and regular bedtimes and no beach 20 yards from our back door.

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But we'll be Beach Bums again. It's only 365 days away....

Outer Banks (sigh...)

What happens in the Outer Banks, stays in the Outer Banks.

Unfortunately.

Here are some things I'd like to take home with me:
-Duh, the ocean.
-Live-in cousins who keep my children entertained.
-Shoes? Fuhgettaboutit!
-A cocktail at one in the afternoon (on the beach!) is perfectly acceptable.
-Bagels for breakfast (carbs be damned!)
-Seashell collecting...soo much more fun than leaf collecting.
-The background sound of the ocean instead of mooing cows.
-Sitting around reading all day is not only permissible, it is encouraged.
-Adult conversation at dinner. Enough said.
-Youngest child so exhausted he asks to go to bed. Really.
-An ultra-relaxed husband. Happens once a year, and this is it.
-Trips to Walmart-ZERO
-Unlimited use of sand, sun, salty sea air, and the roaring Atlantic Ocean.

I'll add pictures in my next post...I've got some good ones this year as my new camera has a great zoom on it!