“Beth Writes…”

So have you ever googled your name followed by “likes to” and put it all in quotes?  (“Beth likes to”)

I will not put my results here, because this is a family friendly column, but let’s just say, there are a lot of Beths out there who like to do a lot more adventurous and icky things than I do.

Go ahead, I know you are dying to go google “Beth likes to” and maybe even “[Insert your name here] likes to”.  I will give you a minute.  Please come back.

I know.  Ew!

Okay, so I thought I’d try a few more things and see how they turned out.  I tried “Beth has a” and discovered that I have a share in Louisville, KY, a degree in Spanish, a wonderful gift I share generously with others around me, a cold, a 4 month old baby, a Master’s Degree in Education, and a pulse on what is important to people in our area.  Nice!  I am a smart, kind, and generous person!

Then I tried “Beth wants to” and found that I want to drop double right click,  be a Pokemon master, change people’s views about what a minister looks like, get married, and release an album on vinyl.  Well, I am certainly a diversified, interesting person!

Next I googled “Beth can’t” thinking it would be all negative, all “Beth can’t do anything right” but guess what!  I’m still awesome!  I found that I can’t fight the feeling, can’t wait to read the book, can’t be topped, and can’t believe I’ve done this 8 times before!  (Hmmm, I might have to go back and click on that one and find out what I’ve done 8 times.  I am hoping it will be something cool like win eight spelling bees!)

Finally, I decided to see what I stand for, test my convictions, check what I think is really important, so I tried “Beth declared that” and discovered that I would not be leaving my job with Howard County Fire Rescue, that I would scrub floors sooner than Murray, that I had no separate source of income to pay my attorney fees, that something reminded me of Thai coconut pancakes, that I’m ready to stop seeing Max, and that olives should not go to waste.   Hmmm.  I don’t seem so strong in my convictions as I do scatterbrained and ditzy.  I think it’s probably Max’s fault, or possibly the olives were tainted and influenced me in some way.

Well, “Beth finishes” seems a logical way to end, and dude, I rock!  I finished the Baltimore marathon, the challenge, my awesome Fox interview, solving problems, golden retrievers (huh?) and apparently, I also finished Maria with the fisherman’s suplex so watch out Maria!  I know a wrestling move and I’m not afraid to use it!

Now, for your own googling pleasure (you know you want to do it) here is another handy link:

Go Google yourself!