Thirteen Pounds

Can I tell you how much I love Halloween?  It’s the one true holiday just for kids, and although we adults often try to get in there and get in on the action, kids are the reason for the season, so to speak. 

My mom wasn’t allowed to trick-or-treat.  Her dad thought it was begging, and wouldn’t allow his children to do it.  That makes me pretty sad that she missed out on the fun.  Plenty of adults around here also don’t allow their children to trick-or-treat because of the holiday’s apparent roots in evil.  Hundreds of years ago.  So these unlucky children aren’t allowed to carve pumpkins or dress up and run around and get candy.    So evil (see, there is where a sarcasm font would come in handy).

I looked through my childhood photo albums and found ONE picture of me in a costume:

I am a bear ready for some rain, posing next to the encyclopedias my parents bought to ensure a future of solid research for me.  I’m not sure why the bear is not brown and furry, but yellow and bearing the picture of a bear.  If I still had those encyclopedias, maybe I could look up the answer for you.  Too bad there is not another handy way of doing research available to me.  And awww!  I’m wearing saddle shoes!  According to the back, I am 2 -1/2 years old. 

I love to make Halloween costumes.  Before the kids were old enough to object, I sewed them into ladybugs and corn on the cobs, a homemade princess and Bob the Builder and Blues Clues.  And then one year Maddie wanted to be a Disney princess, but I really wanted to make her a mermaid costume.  I’m the adult, so I won.  Here’s the picture of her preschool class dressed up that year:

She’s in the bottom left corner.  And I didn’t win that argument.  The class was full of Disney princesses and I felt horrible that I didn’t let her be one too (she’s smiling for the picture, but I could see the longing on her face when all the girls twirled around in their dresses).  That was the year I realized it wasn’t about what I wanted, but what they wanted.  Halloween is for kids.

So I’ve only made costumes if they asked me to, and I’ve bought or pieced together whatever they wanted every year since then.

This year, Maddie was an alien, Ben was an army guy, and Jack was a muscle man.

They came home with THIRTEEN POUNDS of candy (yes, I weighed it!)


I do ration out the candy, because my children all love candy, so, so, so, so much and would devour it in a week if I let them. 

And also…. shhhhh, don’t tell the kids this, but…Dave sneaks out the Almond Joys and Reese’s PB Cups and I sneak out the Kit Kats and Twizzlers.  Shhhhhhhhh.   It’s our secret, okay?  I am counting on you to not let this one slip.

Tonight Dave and I get to dress up too for an adults-only party.  Last year we went as Octomom and her turkey-baster bearing doctor.  This year we are going as Snookie and Pauly D from Jersey Shore.  My bronzer and high hairdo and Dave’s wife-beater and high hairdo are ready to go, because sometimes, adults get to have fun on Halloween too.

I hope yours is a happy one!

Pumpkin Guts

We carved our pumpkins after school today!  It’s a lot of fun, but I’ll admit I’m glad it only happens once a year.

Time to get creative:

Then I carve out the lid.  Here’s Jack’s first look at what’s inside: EWWWW!

Time to dig out the guts! (Ben doesn’t help with this part…he won’t admit it, but I think he’s really grossed out by the smell and look of the inside of the pumpkin).

 

Then I carve the faces they drew.  Here’s the final product:

We roasted the pumpkin seeds with olive oil and sea salt and snacked on them all night.  That’s my favorite part of pumpkin carving!

Happy Halloween!

Sunday at 1:44 PM

I am borrowing this idea from Meg.  I love Meg.

I took a little walk around the house at 1:44 this afternoon.  Here’s what everyone was doing.

Maddie:


Big brother (and neighbor)…


…being stalked at a distance by a little brother…

(I called Jack’s name for the picture above because he was hidden behind the tree.  After I took that one he posed  and smiled…

…then told me to be sure to post the second photo on Facebook.   What a ham.)

Here’s Dave:

He’s watching the Steelers and totally posed for this after I took a picture of him just sitting there and asked him to liven things up for me.  Seriously, wasn’t that sweet of him to oblige me, especially knowing his wife writes a blog and that the photo would be trudging its molasses laden feet around the blogosphere?  (Hmmm, maybe it wasn’t such a big deal after all).  The Steelers scored a goal within about ten minutes of taking this picture, so his wishful thinking paid off!

And me? Well, I’m working on this !*#% Halloween costume of Maddie’s.

All I can say is that it involves silver pleather and that I made it way too small, so now I am ripping seams and adding some panels so her cute little tushy will fit inside of it.  I’m also doing laundry, but you’ll be glad to know I didn’t take a picture of the pile on my bed waiting to be folded, the load in the dryer, the load in the washer, and the load still sitting on the laundry room floor, waiting for its turn.

So that is our Sunday afternoon.  I hope you are enjoying yours.

Ladies’ Man

Jack got his first phone call.  From a GIRL! 

When I told him that “Girl From School” was on the phone and wanted to talk to him, his eyes got big, then he took the phone and said hi.

After that, he didn’t talk for about two minutes.  I hovered near him.  “Is she talking?”  I asked him.  “Yes!”  he whispered.  “Well, talk back!” I said.

Pretty soon he did.  He asked her where she lived and told her where he lived.  He asked her to count to 10, then 4, then 42.  She also asked him to count because there was a lot of counting going on at our end.  A good 5 minutes of conversation were purely counting challenges.  Eventually he told her he had a video phone and could see her.  “Really!  I can see you!  It’s a special phone!”

Ben couldn’t take it.  “Jack, you are lying!  We don’t have a video phone!”

Jack ran into the hall closet and continued the conversation there, where, apparently, he could lie without dumb brothers turning him in.

He started talking in a British accent.  “Helloooo!  Good day!  How ARE you!”  Women do love a British accent, you’ve got to give him points for thinking of it.

They briefly discussed Halloween costumes (she’s going to be a black cat, he’s going to be a muscle man).

He turned on the speaker phone and so did she.  He marveled at how he could hear everything in her house.  “Was that your mom?  What did your brother say?  Is that a dog?”  They laughed and laughed and laughed. 

He eventually came out of the closet and told me he wanted to plug headphones into the phone.  I vetoed that one (I’m not even sure that’s possible).  Then he told her about Herbie the guinea pig and put the phone at the cage hoping Herbie would squeak (he didn’t).  That’s when I heard Girl From School’s mother tell her to say goodbye, as it was time for her to get ready for bed.  They said goodbye, back and forth about ten times.  Finally I said, “Say, ‘See you in school tomorrow!’”  He did. 

The call ended, and I checked the timer on the screen.  He had talked to her for 23 minutes.  I’m not sure I can hold a conversation with Dave for that long, although I’ve never asked him to count, so maybe that’s why.

Neither of these is the girl who called:

This is also not the girl who called.

Neither is this one:

Um, yeah.  Not this one either (note her hand around his waist and, we can assume, his around hers):

Jack is definitely a ladies’ man.  I’m not sure whether to be amused or nervous about this, although I’m definitely leaning toward amused right now as my stomach hurts from laughing outside the closet door for 23 minutes.

Of course, ask me again in 10 years, I may have a different answer for you.

We Interrupt This Car Ride for…

[I’ve been a bad blogger.  Sorry it’s been so long, but it’s been a busy week.]

This weekend we went on a long car ride to meet wonderful friends/hosts where we got to do this…

and this…

and this…

There was crying in the car on the way home.  I won’t say who it was, but she had to go to kindergarten in the morning.

Anyhoo, the ride home was mostly quiet (except for the occasional sob) because everyone was exhausted.  About 45 minutes from home, Jack declared he had to pee.  Fifteen minutes later, Jack declared he could wait NO MORE!  We were so close to home, we hated to pull over to a gas station.  I know that sounds dumb, and I really can’t explain it, but it’s true.

Suddenly, I had a genius idea!  Jack was holding the Vitamin Water bottle he had been drinking, and…can you see where I’m going with this?

Dave pulled over to the side of the road, he and Jack got the equipment in place, then a torrent of pee entered the bottle.  Jack giggled the whole time (and so did the rest of us).  When he was done, Dave gave the bottle a quick dump outside, and brought it back in, tightly capped.  Jack said, “Now we have a pee bottle!  From now on, whenever we need to pee in the car, we will be prepared!”  (Just for the record, we have thrown away the pee bottle).

A few minutes passed, and Jack made the observation that  it was a shame that Maddie and Mama would never be able to use the pee bottle. 

A few more minutes passed and he added, “Except maybe to poop.  That would work!”

I’m telling you, if I ever poop into a Vitamin Water bottle, it will be the day that Hell freezes over as pigs fly through it.

Other than that, it was a lovely weekend.

The Jonagold, The Pinta, and the Santa Maria

Thank you so much, Christopher Columbus!  Besides discovering this fine nation of ours, captaining 3 vessels through sea monster  infested waters, risking your life sailing around on a pancake, and rubbing elbows with Prince Ferdinand and that crazy Queen Isabella, you also got us a day off from school!  Dude, you rock(ed)!

We used our time wisely today, running errands, getting Ben’s Halloween costume bought (Jack and Maddie’s will be handmade), and then we headed to an orchard to pick some apples with some friends.  These are the same friends with whom we picked raspberries and apricots last July. 

Everybody got in the trees.  Jack loves trees.  He picked a little bit, but mostly climbed trees.

 I swear to you, I am trimming his bangs tonight!

We filled four bushels, mostly with Jonagolds, a few with Crispins.

The Crispins were HUGE!  This one is almost half the size of Kris’s head!
There was a lot of snacking going on…


Then it was time to head back to pay.

Now we are planning an apple pie, applesauce, and some apple crisp.  I might try apple butter (does anyone have a good recipe?)  And in my crystal ball, I foresee a lot of apples packed in lunchboxes.

Thanks again, Mr. Columbus!  We will proudly toast you tonight with a glass of apple cider!

Happy Birthday, Jack!

Yesterday, this handsome little fella turned 6!

(Not the big handsome fella, the little one).

The birthday boy or girl always gets to choose his/her supper and birthday cake.  This year, Jack chose Pizza Hut pizza and hot wings, with Jello cake for dessert.  Sometimes the birthday boy or girl goes through my cookbooks and picks out a new, intricate cake recipe to try, so I’ll admit I was relieved at his choice this year, Jello cake is easy.

First, make yourself a white cake.  For picnics, I make it in a 13x9 pan, but for a birthday, I like to make a layer cake.  After you pull the cake out of the oven, make the Jello.  Jack picked cherry, but any flavor will do.  Make the large size box of Jello and mix in 2 c. of boiling water.  Do not add any cold water.
  

While you are baking, keep on the watch for birthday boys who may be sneaking peeks at their presents…


Poke holes in your cake.  I use the end of a wooden spoon for nice big holes.  Once the Jello is mixed, pour it over the cake.  If your cake is still in a 13x9 pan, you are fine, but if you’re doing a layer cake, be sure to have something under your cakes to catch all the Jello runoff!


When all the Jello is poured over the cake, place it in the fridge to cool.  When it’s time for frosting, we use plain old Cool Whip around here.  It tops this cake perfectly.

Time to blow out the candles…


…and eat!

Happy 6th Birthday, Jack!

Jello Cake

1 box white cake mix, prepared

1  large box Jello, any flavor

2 c. boiling water

1 container of Cool Whip

Prepare white cake using box directions.  Immediately after pulling cake from oven, prepare Jello with 2 c. boiling water.  Stir well.  Poke holes in top of cake, then pour the Jello over the entire cake.  Place cake in refrigerator to cool.  When cake is cool, top with Cool Whip.

I am linking this post to Foodie Friday!

I Will Sign Autographs for Cash

I have won an award!  Calm down, mom, it’s not the Good Housekeeping Award for Good Housekeeping.  But it is a lovely award that proves that nepotism is alive and well.  My friend Deb over at her lovely blog, Confessions of an Ugly Mom (and let me tell you, she is SO not ugly), won one of those awards that bloggers pass around (because she earned it, she’s an awesome writer, this woman should be writing a novel) and she probably didn’t know who to send it on to, so she sent it on to me, her friend across the corn field (Hey Deb!  I see you over there!)  If you’ve never gone to Deb’s blog, stop reading now and click on that link up there.  She’s an amazing writer, and has a good heart to boot.  She’s walking in the Susan G. Komen 3 Day Walk for the Cure soon.  That’s 60 miles in 3 days to honor the memory of her friend Yvonne.  See?  Amazing.

Here is my award.  I am looking into getting it put on a plaque.  I’ll let you know if that works out.


Okay, so now I’m supposed to share seven things with my readers that they may not already know about me.  This is going to be tough.  You know I just hate to talk about myself.  (There really should be a sarcasm font, and if there was, I’d just about wear that font out).   Are you ready for some heart-wrenching discoveries about me?  Here we go!

1.  If I could travel in time, I would go back to my 4th grade spelling bee and put  the “c” in excite and then go to my 7th grade spelling bee and reverse my “a” and “o” in the word cinnamon.  I would also go back to my wedding reception and squeeze a short yet competitive spelling bee in between the Dollar Dance and the Chicken Dance. I just love spelling bees.   It really burns me that my bratty brother Dave WON his 4th grade spelling bee.  I have never gotten over that.  When I turn 50, which is not for a VERY long time, I do not want a trip or a big party (okay, I’d like a trip), I’d mostly like to have a spelling bee that everyone lets me win.

2.  I have a Dental and Dog phobia (though generally I am not bothered by dentists and dogs at the same time).  If I could choose to go to either the dentist or gynecologist, it would be  gynecologist, hands down, although I am better now about going to the dentist than I was 15 years ago.  We didn’t go to the dentist when I was growing up (my parents believed in fixing what was broken—not preventive medicine), so when my mouth fell apart at age 24, and I had to get, like, 16 fillings, a root canal, my wisdom teeth removed and a giant slap across my face for being irresponsible (I’m kidding- the dentist only threatened to slap me), I began to cry and hyperventilate in the dentist chair every visit.  When I met Dave, I switched to his dentist, and I love him so much.  In the beginning, he let me cry, and talked me down off the window ledge, and then he lied to me about everything he was going to do.  He hid the drills and told me he was just rinsing my mouth out with a special tool, and he told me I’d be done so fast, and even though he said it 12 times, I believed him each time, and it helped.  He’s a kind,caring dentist, one in a million.   But I’d still rather go to the gynecologist.   Also, a big scary dog barked at me in a field when I was a kid and scared me to death.  I still don’t like big dogs, and I’m not so fond of little ones either. 

3.  My favorite movie ever is When Harry Met Sally.  I practically have it memorized, and when I stumble across it on t.v.,  I am thrilled like it’s Christmas Day.

4.  Okay, you may have heard this one before, because I trot it out whenever I’m asked to share something interesting about myself, as it may be the only really interesting thing I’ve ever done:  I did my student teaching in Brussels, Belgium, in an International School meant for the children of NATO  and European Community officials and any other foreigners living in Brussels.  It was awesome.  Besides the astounding training I got from one of the best teachers ever (she was from Canada, and her husband was in NATO somehow), I got to travel every weekend, hopping on trains with my Eurail pass and seeking out hostels on the fly.  I was there with two other friends, and we went to Amsterdam, London, Paris, Venice, Pisa, Florence, Salzburg, Cologne, and many other places (come on over!  I will pull out my photo album and painfully lead you through it!)  We had so much fun, though I was homesick the whole time. 

5. I was, at one time, a pretty good flutist.  I spent 1-3 hours a day practicing in high school, and made district and regional bands, but missed state band by one chair my senior year.  I also played piccolo and oboe, and took a little piano as an adult, though I am really bad at piano.  I miss playing a lot.

6.  I forget names.  I mean, I am really, really, really bad at names.   I think part of that is not really paying attention when I’m introduced to someone, or I’m half-listening and half-thinking about what I’m going to say next, and then I realize that I missed the person’s name and the last part of what he said, or I see someone from years ago, someone with whom I’ve spent many delightful hours yet I just can’t drag the name from my brain file, or it’s someone I see every day, yet I freeze and panic and hope the name will come to me by the time the person walks across the room.  And I am a bad faker when I don’t remember a name.  Dave always tells me to fake it, to just pull a, “Hey, you!  How are YOU doing?!”  But I can’t do it.

7.  If I could change careers at this point in my life, I think I’d like to become a Sign Language Interpreter.  I wonder if it’s easier to fake names in sign language?

A "Versatile Blogger" brings everything to the table - a little of this and a little of that."    Now, here are the rules for the Versatile Blogger Award:

• Thank and link back to the person who gave you the award (done).
• Share 7 things about yourself (done)
• Pass the award on to (up to) 15 other bloggers whom you have recently discovered and think are fabulous (see below)
• Contact the bloggers you chose and let them know about the award (tomorrow I will, I promise).

I hereby pass this award on to
Jen at 4ever Love-  Jen recently started her blog, and she’s off to a great start!  Her last post showing pictures of her son’s busy little activities in the doctor’s waiting room were hilarious!

Maria at Mangia, Figlie-  Maria’s food blog is not just about the recipes, it is more often about the history of the food, and her history with the food.    She’s a good writer and friend!

Stephanie at Conversations from the Cul-de-Sac-Stephanie’s blog is a hodgepodge of decorating, shopping, bargain seeking, and most recently, evidence of her struggle over her Sephora addiction.  Her blog is lots of fun!

Tiffanee at One Crazy Cookie-Tiffanee posts recipes on her  food blog several times a week, which I find amazing since I struggle to do any more cooking  than required by state law.  Almost all of her recipes appeal to me too---the right number of ingredients, yummy sounding, and a recipe my family would love.  Her most recent post is Parmesan Biscuit Wedges and sounds delicious!

Okay, people, I would nominate more, but I’m tired of all the hyperlinks.  I am too lazy to keep going on this.  If there were a #8, I’d add “Too lazy to hyperlink all the time.”

One Bad and Two Good

Jack, who just loooves kindergarten, came home the other day and told me, “There was one bad thing about today and two good things.  The bad thing is that…[dramatic pause] ‘Naughty Kid’ got a red today!”  (Red is not good.  All kindergartners dread the red.)   “The two good things are…I made a new friend and now I can kick and tuck when I swing!”

I’ve been after him to kick and tuck while swinging for a few years now, explaining that then he wouldn’t need to wait until I was available to push him anymore.  He’d be able to swing whenever the mood came over him.  But he could just never do it.   ‘Til now.

Kick…

and tuck.

With no pushes needed from me.

Dave joined him for a celebratory swing:

Life is good.