School’s out, people. If you are happy about it, you are probably lying, putting on a brave face, or deranged. I love my children so, so much, but I don’t love the bickering and whining that happens when they spend too much time together. And three months is a lot of time to spend together. In honor of the last day of school, I have written some bad poetry for you. Sylvia Plath-like, depressing, grim poetry. I apologize in advance if you feel gloomy and suicidal after reading it.
School’s Out Cinquain
Summer
Child infested
Crying, Whining, Sweating
Calgon, Take Me Away!
Summer
An Elegy for School
The school bell tolls the fateful hour
The gray clouds rumble, grumble, and part
The sky cries along with the waiting mothers
Their memories of a childless shopping cart
Dashed to a thousand bits
As their naughty, whiny, petulant tots
Emerge from the red brick school.
Arms flailing! Mouths yelling! Feet kicking!
Gimme! Gimme! Gimme!
Mothers hug their young charges, but
Headaches loom, gray hairs spring, their cheeks glisten with a lone, salty tear
As they brave with smiles
The death of another school year.
WHINERS
Why can’t I sleep ‘til noon?
His ice cream cone is bigger than mine.
It’s not fair!
No one else has to do jobs except me!
Everyone else gets to play Wii all day except for me!
Read a book? Too boooring.
Stupid summer.
Goodbye, Today Show, I Will Miss You
On Wednesday, they get off the yellow bus
With dreams of swimming, popsicles, and sleep.
They skip on home, their backpacks flung aside
The pencils, pens, and tablets in a heap
The best three months have finally arrived
Sweet freedom from the droning of Ms. Teach
Their iPods charged, a snack at hand, the pool
Is beckoning them like a sandy beach.
The time has come for children everywhere
To lay aside their worries, woes, and pens
No homework now, immunity from tests
Just fun and sun and laughter with their friends.
But mothers know the sad and dismal truth
When kids’ vacation starts moms’ work begins
One hundred days of servitude and strife
See there? The crack amid her joyless grin.
Roses Are Red
Roses are red
Pencils are yellow
The first day of school
Is August 27th and it will be AWESOME! I can’t wait! Woot! Woot! In your faces, schoolchildren!
2 comments:
HA! Great poetry! I think you need to look into getting those published! Our last day was yesterday. Maggie told me the superintendent came into her classroom and said, "Guess what, kids?! Only 11 1/2 weeks until school starts again!!!YEAH!" Maggie was not amused, but I think I might like to hang out with him. Especially since yesterday at 2:00, approximately 3 1/2 hrs after getting out of school for the year, both Maggie and Lucy were lying on the floor, moaning, "WE'RE SOOOOOOOOOO BORED!!!" I'm gonna make a summer chore chart, to fight off those pesky boredom blues!
These totally need to be pinned to Pinterest, Facebook, the moon and stuffed in Bibles across the world. Amen.
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